boredbored

and then all of a sudden, there it is! A message from Ted. Saying that there just wasn’t enough time. And I ask for advice on what’s up in the city, and he says he’s out with some friends but they don’t know where they’re going either. “Take me with! (We don’t even have to make out.) I’m bored out of my mind!” I quickly reply, and at this point I’m being perfectly honest. I’m over Ted, I just want to go out and socialize. “Sorry :p” he says. (And I do give him cred for actually replying there…) So that’s the end of the Ted story, but now I have a totally differeng problem. I’m going out of my mind ’cause I’m so bored and all of the friends I couldv’e gone out with are at home sick or tired or whatever…

And I miss Tokyo like mad. In Tokyo you could go out to the nearest bar and have new friends within 15 minutes. 

But it’s Saturday!!!

So I’m sitting here watching the finale of “A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila” 

I better get this ass of mine out tonight! But I don’t want to go out alone… Dammit!

 

***

 

Noooooo!!!! I can’t believe she chose the boy! What the fuck?!?! Anyone could see that Dani was the right one for her! Aaaaawww…

the sound of nothing

I hate it when my phone rings now. Even though I think I know that Ted actually won’t be contacting me at this point, my first thought is always: “Ted?!” And then I feel a bit foolish and get a little disappointed.

Funny thing is that in reality I haven’t had much contact with Ted except for on facebook. So he actually doesn’t mean much to me at all, but somehow I built this image of how much fun I was going to have with him. I built it so solid that I’m actually disappointed. “Oh, but all the fun I’m not having!” 

I’m sure the intitial feeling of surprise will wear off soon, and I have certainly learned from this. 

nothing

Ted stopped by work today. He was there one moment, and then he was gone. “Hey, what are you going here?!” I asked, but another colleague butted in and he never got a chance to reply.

And when he was goen I thought “Surely, he’ll leave me a message somewhere. In my locker? A text message?” but nothing. All evening (I was working the late shift) nothing. And when I got home, nothing.

I sent him a text message saying “Frankie, what happened? change your mind? ” to which there was no reply, and I have to admit, in disbelief, that he probably did. And I’m really, really surprised!

Does this mean that it really is true that you can’t be straightforward with a guy? That we have to make you work for it, wait for it, unceartain if you will get it, in order to really keep your interrest? Even though we may want it more than you do? Even though it’s just physical? Even thouh we’d get so much more stuff done if we just dropped the charade? It kind of hurts my brain to think that I might have to keep playing this game until the end of time. I just don’t know if I have the energy.

Anyways, I’ve learned my lesson: Thou shalt not throw away all pretences and make yourself available for any guy. Sucks.